If I had Instagram, I think my most used tag would be #momfail. I had a day last week that I felt as I failed as mama. I had worked in the clinic for a half day and was excited to spend the afternoon with my boy. It had been a long week of subzero temperatures, snowstorm after snowstorm, as well as early morning awakenings (thank you molars). I had a to-do list a mile long and as I left work I thought of all the things I could get done during nap time. As always, my schedule is determined by J’s schedule. I got home, took over for grandma, and did the nap routine (read, song, rock, lay down) except Little Mister got upset once laid down. I thought maybe he is overtired. I will never understand how children when overtired will fight their nap even longer. When I’m overtired, I crash and burn. Regardless, I was overwhelmed with J crying in the background, the dog crying to go out, and my stomach growling. I quickly took the dog out (with baby monitor in tow) and waited not so patiently to see if he would calm down. He was still fussing 15 min later. I went back in and tried to soothe him. He got madder when I left. Then of course the dog started barking because the UPS man was dropping off packages. That activated Little Man and he began chatting in his crib (“Mama. Mama. Mama!”). Always the sweetest things to say when it should be nap time. I knew then that it was likely a no nap day.
I cried. I wanted that nap time to eat lunch, to watch the shows piling up on my DVR, to ice my wrist (sprained after falling while shoveling the driveway), and to use the heating pad on my neck (also likely from shoveling). I was a MESS.
I was thinking all of myself. As I went up to get him out of his crib, all he could do was smile at me. He was so glad to see me. He didn’t care that I was a mess because I was mom. And that is always enough. As a mom, I am constantly adding more and more to my plate. I want to do another project, make another meal, start another book, increase my running mileage, etc. but I forget that mommying is my priority. My reason why. And that is always enough!
Tell me about your reason(s) why?